Tag: #mentalhealthawareness

Mental Wellness in Winter

In Mental Wellbeing, Self Help, Self-care, Wellness

In the northern hemisphere, daylight hours are shortened in winter, generally, from last September to March. This means that we get less exposure to sunlight. Sunlight gives us positive mental wellness. It’s warm mentally and physically, as well as being essential to our health. I want to share some of my mental wellness strategies for the coming winter months. Some of these strategies are an adaptation from others, and some are ones I adopted through practising.

But, first on the importance of mental wellness, specifically in the coming months. Mental wellness is as essential as physical wellness. After all, a healthy body equals a healthy mind. Most of us take regular exercises to improve our physical health, whether through walking, cardio-vascular exercises or fitness classes. I regularly take long walks, practise kickboxing and MMA at least four times a week. If we can look at ways to apply the same strategy to our mental health, we are on the way to improving our overall wellbeing.

However, with the upcoming weather changes and shorter daylight hours, we can be affected by the seasonal changes. Seasonal affective disorders (or SAD) are prevalent. Changes in our external environment will invariably affect change in our inner world. I certainly have noticed the fast-approaching dark nights and the lacking of energy.

What are mental health and mental wellness?

Mental health concerns the health of our mind, psyche and mental construct. This includes our thoughts, our thinking style and our mental model of the world. The mind never sleeps because it works to ensure that our internal organs are functioning at all times. It operates on a cycle that recurs every twenty-four hours, and it is better known as the circadian rhythm. Within the circadian rhythm, various internal organs become active in alignment with the meridian circuit at their peak time. Positive mental health and wellness is a balance of the body-mind in one wholistic system working together. Adverse mental health and illness is an imbalance of the body-mind system causing misalignments.

Why do most of us struggle with our mental health in the winter more so than in the spring or summer months?

Many factors can negatively affect our mental health. Most of us will struggle with daily challenges such as worrying about our finances, job insecurities, time-pressured job-related responsibilities, family worries, relationship concerns etc. But, changes in the weather can also be a factor that lower moods and dampen the spirit.

Most of us may struggle with our mental health in the winter months mainly because of environmental changes, but other influences can be. The fluctuation in the atmospheric pressure can lead to lethargy, tiredness and fatigue. The quickening dark nights do limit our time in daylight. The shorter days come with limitations and the desire to hibernate. Our desire to get out of bed when it is still dark can diminished. And we lack the will to do energy. We grapple with staying positive, and our mental health can slide into low moods.

The good news is that we can do something about this, and we are all capable of taking steps to help improve our mental wellbeing during the winter months. The benefits of positive mental health are essential for our overall wellbeing. Here are some helpful strategies to get you through the upcoming months.

Surround yourself with natural (day)light bulbs or lamps

You can buy daylight bulbs or lamps in any lighting shop or online. The benefits of daylight bulbs help increase our exposure to natural daylight. It helps to improve our moods and mental awareness. It also helps to reduce Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). Try it for yourself.

Surround yourself with psychic protection

Be in a meditative state. Visualise yourself surrounded by a transparent white light that encased your entire body. Within the protective bubble, feel the warmth of white light energy recharging your spiritual and physical body.

Ensure that you are well-nourished

For a healthy body-mind, we need to take care of the physical body as this helps maintain a healthy mind. Eating a regular, colourful and balanced diet is essential for positive physical health.

Wellness is about balanced in all aspects of beingness. Eating in moderation. Drinking in moderation. Exercise in moderation etc.

Incorporate meditation into your day

Make time for meditation, set yourself the time and space to be with your inner world. This means sitting still, preferably in a quiet and peaceful place, outside if possible. Go inside yourself. Be with your thoughts and allow your mind to wander, and just observe whatever you’re thinking. And notice the different things that your might be thinking about. And see who is observing the thoughts.

Practice mindfulness

Practice being mindful. Mindfulness is a conscious awareness of our thoughts and the mind. It is about making our automatic thoughts and the thing we think about conscious. If you tend to ruminate over a situation, being mindful helps you to notice the recurring thoughts. Then, you can ask yourself why you keep thinking about those thoughts. You should begin to see a pattern of repetitive thoughts or recurring thinking. I often find myself repeatedly thinking about wrongdoers. The individuals who have caused me aggrieved.

Mindfulness is simply being conscious about your present state of being and notice what you are consciously doing, thinking and feeling at that instance. It is about acknowledging what is and accepting the presentness of those sensations.

Nurture your spiritual Self

Naturally, as we take care of our physical body, we also need to consider our Spiritual Self too. Nurturing our spiritual Self include adopting rituals and practices that align with our beliefs, including religious and cultural traditions. Nurturing your soul also include transparency, honesty and being truthful to yourself. This means confessing and admitting your mistakes and take ownership of your responsibilities. Acknowledge your wrongdoings and let go of the false pride. Inevitably, you can find forgiveness for yourself and for others.

Keeping warm

When the temperature drops below our ideal condition, we can be affected energetically. If it’s cold outside, we naturally strive to keep warm. If it’s warm outside, we will adhere to stay cool. Keeping warm physically by insulating our body. Keep warm mentally by ensuring that you wear warm colours, warm food such as chillies or jalapenos peppers, and drink warming beverages. Light a candle – do not underestimate the warmth of a single candle.

“Happiness cannot be persued, it must be ensue.” – Viktor E. Frankl.

Do you find this blog helpful? If you like this post, I love to hear from you on my Twitter Page.

Men’s Health Matters

In Mens Health, Mental Wellbeing, Self-care, Self-Development

In this month’s blog, I would like to highlight men’s health. The essential differences between men and women are apparent, according to British psychologist Simon Baron-Cohen. He stated that some men struggle to talk about feelings because they are hard-wired in the brain for ‘systemising’ to understand and build systems. However, it isn’t to say that this is the only reason why men rarely seek therapy or visit the doctor as regularly as women. Perhaps, there is something beyond our biology but more to do with one’s environment. Men’s health matters as much as women’s, and I want to address it here because there is a disparity in societal awareness.

If you research men’s health, you will that men are just as concerned with some of the health issues faced by women. Some of those issues, according to WebMD, include depression, anxieties, panic, alcoholism, heart disease, prostate problems, erectile dysfunction and hair loss, just to name a few. In the UK, one in eight men experiences health issues, specifically around Mid-life as an existential crisis. There is an unconscious transgenerational trance that put pressure on men in modern societies. The pressure includes being the breadwinner, the provider, the protector, the saviour. These unhelpful roles and expectations put a continuous constraint on men on a daily basis. Men’s health matter, and we can break free from the limitation of those archaic beliefs. We can all do our part in changing our expectation of the men in our lives. We can encourage our partner, our dads, our grandad, and our male friends to be opened to their feelings and emotions, including concerns for their health and wellbeing.

Men have genuine health concerns, which we should all validate. Suicide, for example, are higher in men than women, resulting from depression. Still, there is a lack of awareness, ineffective communication and unhealthy work-life balance from expectation in the workplace and at home. We can all help to minimise men’s health risks and have compassion for the inner struggle they faced and unable to vocalise.

“Health is the greatest gift, contentment is the greatest wealth.” – Buddha.

Here’s how you can help

Trust your instinct when you notice the subtle signs

If you are a wife, girlfriend or partner and suspect that your spouse struggles with his mental health. Trust your instinct and speak out for him. With his systemising brain, he might not be able to express the feelings and emotions associated with the physical symptoms of struggles. It would be an intimate experience within the relationship if you initiate the conversation. You might begin with something like, “I wonder if you are struggling with work, I noticed that you have been tired from working late all this week”, or “I wonder if you are experiencing something difficult because you have been avoiding being intimate with me?”. The subtle signs that you notice could be the beginning of a physical health issue.

Begin with your feelings

When you being a conversation with an acknowledgement of your feelings and emotions, it gives the other person permission to express theirs. Most men struggle to tell you how they feel and what they think. If you make a start, it helps to normalise freedom of expression. It doesn’t come naturally to men, remember. It does not mean that they can’t learn. When you express your feeling toward them, it also helps them see, hear and understand your concern. You might begin with, “I feel like we have drifted apart, and I feel sad about that; what has been going on for you lately?” or “I feel sad and experience a distance between us because we have not been intimate, is there something you are feeling also?”

You cannot force what doesn’t come naturally

Generally, men will resist talking about feeling and emotion because they are not naturally emphatic. They should not be forced to have a ‘girly’ talk but rather encourage. They could be a mindset that prevents them from expressing their feeling. It might have been from conditioning in childhood that made them considered talking and showing emotions as signs of weakness. If that’s the case, we have to help them unlearned those unhelpful conditions. We would do this with love and patient, not shouting or nagging.

“If one speaks or act with a pure mind, happiness and love will follow.” – Buddha.

There are times when you need to take control

You might find that you will need to take control of their health matters. I don’t know if you feel the same, but I often have to book my husband’s doctors appointment for him. I even had to schedule his COVID-19 booking because he kept postponing the task. There might be fear in that. There might be a mindset that says, why fix it when it still works? Taking control and taking charge of your man’s health is you addressing the avoidance. You might even consider initiating a discussion as taking control. It is easy to bury our heads in the sand, but it shouldn’t be ignored when it comes to health and wellbeing.

Validate and affirm their experiences

Sometimes it is difficult to express our emotions and feelings. The intensity of our emotions can control us and take over the logical, practical mind. We can’t work or do anything if we spend all our time in tears or emotional turmoil. It can feel lonely when we are consumed with emotions. When our emotions overwhelm us, we can validate them and accept them rather than repress them. We need to make friends with our feelings. We can help our husband, boyfriend or partner by validating emotions that overwhelmed them and affirm their struggle. In the acknowledgement, you are allowing them to be okay as they grapple with the inner brawl.

Appraisal, not appeasing

Who doesn’t like a compliment? The majority of us love being complimented and appraised. However, sometimes people struggle to say something nice. It is more habitual for us to critique rather than being pleasant. Many of us take our loved ones for granted, which is unhelpful. If we want to help bring awareness to our male partner’s health, we need to appraise his ego. But, be careful not to appease him by satisfying his egoic or narcissistic needs. An appraisal comes from the heart, and it is expressed with kindness. But, an appeasing comes from a place of fear.

“Never let your fear decide your future.” – Buddha.

Do not shame, blame or guilt-trip

It takes a lot of courage for people to share. It can seem like they have to build up their inner strength to talk about something personal, especially if it is something intimate and private. As a listening, it is most unhelpful to shame, judge or blame the person in the disclosure. Even if you displayed signs of shock or disbelief, it could be off-putting. Notice your reactions in response to what was shared when a man wants to address his hair loss problem, for example. There are deeper psychological emotions behind the feelings being displayed. For the man, it might be a loss of his fragility or virility. Never make them feel guilty for what men share because all things disclosed are genuine concerns and valid.

“It is easy to see the fault in others, but it is more difficult to see one’s own faults.” – Buddha.

What I have highlighted here is no mean extensive to men’s mental health or worries. You can probably come up with many other ways to help spread men’s health awareness. It starts with you, and you can make a huge difference someone whether he is a friend, family member or work colleague. With loving-kindness, you can really help men open up about their health concerns especially when you show a willingness to listen and express interests in their health and wellbeing.

“No one can walk the path for you, but you can share and unburdern you load.” – Unknown.

Do you find this blog helpful? If you like this post, I love to hear from you on my Twitter Page.

Mental Health Awareness

In Compassion, Coping Strategy, Inspiration, Mental Wellbeing, Motivation, Self Help, Self-care, Self-Development, Wellness

Mental health is a recognition of our psyche and our psychological wellness. It is a way of looking at the conditions of the mind and relating to the mind. And when we look at the psyche, we also need to consider the health of the mind. In an acknowledgement of our state of mind, we will understand and have an awareness of our mental health.

In the same way, as we take care of our physical health, the body. We would ensure that we get enough sleep, eat well, exercise and have adequate rests. It is now becoming more apparent that we would benefit from taking care of our mental health, the mind. It would ensure that we are mindful of reducing stress tension on the grey areas of the brain, improving planning, helping with problem-solving abilities, and enhancing concentration and mental clarity.

As a therapist, I work with clients to connect the body, feelings and mind to promote wholeness within an individual. However, in this month’s blog, I want to address the mental aspect of wellness and to be more aware of your mental health.

Mental health has been a challenge that has recently spiked on the global scale since the pandemic. It has long been a part of Western societies since the birth of psychiatry, and possibly longer than that. Mental disturbances are a challenge that poses psychological and physical discomfort in the individual. Mental disturbances can range from worrying about your loved ones to concern for their safety and welfare. It is any disturbances that are constructed in the mind. The longer we are exposed to these disturbances, the more problem it poses on our mental health. Thus, our mental wellness depends on the way we think and how we construct our inner world.

Not only that, there are some judgements towards people with mental health issues as well. There are also prejudices or preconceived ideas that people may have towards someone with mental health problems, not necessarily based on reasons or experiences. These individuals’ subjective experiences can often do more harm than good to any person experiencing mental illness or disorder. Within the awareness of mental health problems, I will also address the stigma behind mental health awareness.

To understand mental health further, I want to begin by highlighting the four primary types of mental illnesses. They include:

Anxiety disorders such as panic disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, extreme fears and phobias.
Depressive disorders such as depression, bipolar disorder and mood disorder.
Personality disorders such as maladaptive behaviour, self-defeating and self-destructive behaviour.
Psychotic disorders such as schizophrenia and psychosis.

These four major types of mental illnesses extend to other psychological conditions, potentially leading to poor mental health, especially over a long period of suffering. Our mental wellness includes all aspects of the mind, including our thinking, thought processes, the mental construct, perception, psychological framework, and social wellbeing.

The influences of those around us shaped our sense of Self. The conditioning and the way we were brought up will impact the mental aspect of our health. If we experienced a positive, nurturing, and supportive environment, we are likely to foster a healthy mental state. But, if our experience was negative, hostile and unsupportive, we are likely to have an adverse mental state. This can worsen our cognitive processes and further distort our inner view of the world.

“A negative mind will never give you a positive thoughts.” – Buddha.

Furthermore, when our mental being is fragile with a negative experiential outlook, we can become sensitive to experiences with others. As our feelings are heightened, our emotions might get the better of us. Before we become aware of our mental state, we have just control of our behaviour and action. As we internalised the external problem, we often conclude that we overreacted to a situation. However, that may not be the case. But, it is possible that, in the heat of the moment, our outburst was confused with it being exaggerated or misinterpreted as dramatic. As the individual suffering from mental health picks up these unhelpful cues, it can be read as insensitive or judgmental. This seemingly minor engagement can have a detrimental effect on a person with mental sensitivity.

Mental health awareness is the ability to develop compassion for ourselves and our mental construct as well as the mental capability of another. It is also about treating ourselves and others the way we would like to be treated. It is about watching our thoughts and thinking well of ourselves and others. Having an awareness of our thought processes give us realisation. In the realisation, we become compassionate with ourselves and how our mind works things out.

Here are my helpful tips on how to be more aware of your mental health wellbeing.

Watch your mental construct

Watch your internal self-talk. Watch how you talk to yourself, including the use of your language. Listen to how your mind makes sense of the situation, how you read things, and how it is constructed in your mental images.

For example, if you see yourself sitting in the waiting room, tapping your feet. The underlying observation might be that your behaviours indicated nervousness or impatience, depending on what follows your thoughts. Anxiety, for instance, is a construct that follows a set of behaviour and thought pattern.

Observe your inner feelings

“It is easier to see the faults in others and blame others than it is to look within and see our own faults.” – Buddha.

Observe your internal feelings and emotions in response to your behaviour and initial thoughts. Thoughts give rise to our internal state, which drives our behaviour and action. If you can recognise your inner feelings in response to your thinking, you can notice that you can own your emotions. Sometimes, we blame others or the situation for how it makes us feel, but if you are truly honest with yourself, you will see that your thoughts about the situation or person trigger your emotions and feelings. Isn’t it time you take responsibilities for how you think and feel?

In the above example, observing your inner feeling might include seeing what it is about waiting that is anxiety-provoking for you. Are you feeling nervous about the meeting, which then led you to tap your feet nervously?

“Be patient, be yourself, judge nothing and everything will come to you when the time is right.” – Buddha.

Notice your response to a situation

Notice your response to a situation or person. Notice your behaviours and reaction to a situation or person can help bring awareness to mental processes. Your response to others or condition depends on your subjective experiences. However, your personal experiences are not the whole of you. It is only a part of you as a whole. Having an understanding of your behaviour will you help maintain control of yourselves and your behaviour. It also projects confidence to others in the way you remained in control of yourself. If you cannot control yourself or your response, how do you expect others to respond to you?

Check your unconscious gain

“Appreciate what is and expect nothing because life is what is it.” – Buddha.

Unconscious gain is a complex mental process that the individual has no awareness of the self-serving proceeding activities. It is often an attempt to reduce anxieties and distress within oneself. Can you be honest with yourself and admit your unconscious gain? If you can be honest with yourself, you can begin to have a relationship with yourself. Being honest with yourself means acknowledging your behaviour, feelings and action. Can you recognise that you may have overreacted in a situation because you did not like being accused of something? Can you admit that you may have lost control in an attempt to defend yourself in an argument? Realising your unconscious gain behind your behaviours will help you understand your needs.

In the above example, the unconscious gain behind tapping your feet while in the waiting room might be your way of alleviating the inner nervousness.

“It is better to conquer yourself than win other’s battle. Then the victory is reward that no one can take away from you.” – Buddha.

Reframe your belief system

Reframing your belief system is simply a way to think differently about your belief system. It is about changing your mindset to mindful. It is a way of challenging your thoughts, beliefs and then change them. It is adaptive and flexible thinking.

A belief system is a mindset that you have established or learned based on lived experiences. It is your mind-set-in-stone. It is a rigid belief about something or someone. In contrast, mindfulness is a conscious and flexible approach to thinking. If you can challenge your idea, you can begin to improve your thought processes, leading to mental wellness.

Per the above example, you might have negative experiences of waiting for something or someone. Your negative experience might include negative feelings such as rejection. Thus, this might have given rise to a mindset that waiting will lead to bad news or bad feelings. If this was the belief, you could ask yourself, what evidence do you have that indicated that waiting (this time round) means that you will also receive bad news? Where is it written or documented that waiting equates to rejection? Remember that just because you had that bad experiences in the past does not mean that all future outcome will be the same.

Reframing your belief can be difficult if people around you still reinforces the idea. It would help if you have the will (volition) to challenge the thought. If you are struggling with reframing, ask yourself what the benefit of having the belief is? Who is benefiting from the mindset? How is the belief serve you?

“What you believe becomes your reality because the thoughts created in your mind, the mind makes it happens.” – The Law of Belief.

Challenge yourself to change the way you think

Challenge yourself to change your thinking pattern and find an alternate way to look at things. There is no wrong way to challenge your thoughts. Any form of challenge is the right way, I’d say. One of the easiest ways to challenge yourself is to question yourself—questions like why, what, or how are a great way to get your mind to rethink the problem. Why did I think that waiting here today, at this appointment, means that it will be the same as the last meeting? What makes me think that this appointment will turn out like the last one? How is this meeting the same as the previous?

You are more than your mind. Therefore, you are more than the way you think and what you think. Thinking is just what you happen to do because the brain does not shut up. Thoughts will always intrude on the psyche. But, thought forms, and then they disappear. When you give focus, attention and meaning to the ideas, your thinking and other thought-forms arise to become problematic. It is at this point that having a compassionate mind is helpful. If we fight against our thoughts, we are essentially fighting against ourselves. Let’s face it, why does anyone want that internal struggle.

Like anything in life, the more you practice, the more proficient you will become. Having an awareness of ourselves helps us to know more about our wellness. Plus, learning things about ourselves should be an enjoyable experience. What’s not to like about yourself?